More Plot Holes Than Meets The Eye

So thanks to HBO, I've seen Michael Bay's Transformers movie at least a dozen times. If there's nothing else on and Transformers is, I end up watching it. Don't know, its just one of those movies. I think Megan Fox has something to do with it. Anyway, I never really paid attention to the "plot" of the movie before because its Transformers and Michael Bay, so I figured it didn't matter. And it doesn't, but when I finally didn't pay attention, I found that the plot makes absolutely no sense. Sure, the movie's 18 months old, but I just now realized how ludicrous the story is.

According to the Autobots, Megatron's plan is to use the Allspark to transform Earth's technology into weapons to rebuild his army and destroy the world. But according to the guys at Sector 7, Megatron crash landed in the Artic Circle about 2,000 years ago while looking for the Allspark and has be in some form of frozen state since then. Also, all of Earth's technology was apparently reverse-engineered from Megatron himself. So if he's been frozen all these years, how could he possibly have a plan to usurp Earth's technologies when there wasn't even any technology for him to usurp before he got here? And how the hell does Megatron know anything about humans anyway? He's been out of commission since he crash landed, so what the fuck? There are plot holes and then there are plot holes; this is the latter. I mean, even Snakes On A Plane made an attempt to explain its ridiculous potential holes; Transformers didn't even try.

Clearly this is my fault for paying too much attention to the movie; I get that. But after enough viewings, some things are just inevitable. That said, I'm sure the sequel will be just as inane, and I'm sure I'll see it its opening weekend.