Super Bowl XLIII LIve Blog Mega-Post

Okay, so here's me trying my hand at live blogging an event. And what better event to do that than the Super Bowl. Naturally, most of this is just mindless crap. But then again, what isn't on this site?

Pre-Game

6:00 Just turned to the Super Bowl coverage because I there was no way I could’ve made it through 5 hours of the pregame show. Half hour I can stand. Let’s see how this turns out.

6:06 Do we really need to see the players walk out of the locker room? Enter the field, okay, but waiting in the tunnel?

6:08 Dr. Foreman is in the house. Anyone seen Thirteen?

6:09 Here come the Steelers. Fuck the Steelers.

6:10 Was that me, or did the Cardinals just get a louder reception? Or was that because there were just a lot of boos mixed in?

6:13 No noteworthy commercials yet. Maybe they start when the actual game starts.

6:15 Okay, nothing against Walter Payton, but why give this award out now? Timing seems odd. Prop bet alert: Shots of Brenda Warner- 1.

6:16 Uh, a musical performance just for the sake of having a musical performance? Was Faith Hill guaranteed a performance since she sings the Sunday Night Football intro song?

6:18 And the people on the Lost DVD said that a water landing was impossible with a plane. Pfft. There's your proof.

6:21 Not a bad National Anthem. Looks like it was pre-recorded, and there’s nothing wrong with that. One thing- if you’re going to sing it in 4/4, stay in 4/4, don’t jump back into 3/4. Consistency is key. Prop bet alert: six planes in the flyover.

6:22 HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT, G.I. JOE!!!!!!!!!

6:24 Been hearing Joe Cocker's Feelin' Alright all over the place recently. Love the song, so I’m not complaining, but its sudden appearance and use everywhere is kinda odd.

6:27 General Petraeus doesn’t have anything else better to be doing tonight, huh? Yeah, didn’t think so.

6:28 Prop bet alert: Heads, Arizona wins the toss, defers until the second half.

First Quarter

6:32 Kickoff… finally. Now, who’s playing again?

6:33 Fuck Hines Ward. Maybe put a guy on him? Maybe? Fuck Hines Ward.

6:38 Arizona should challenge that one; Ben’s knee might have been down. Many prop bets hinge on this call (outcome of first score and first challenge).

6:42 Refs get the call right, and many prop bets are paid off. Dr. Foreman pussies out and tries the field goal. Wuss.

6:44 Liked the Bob Dylan/Will.I.Am mashup. Gina Carano was in it, so I know Puddin’ LOVED it. That will be his favorite commercial of the night, hands down.

6:48 Prop bet alert: first penalty, holding on the Cardinals.

6:52 Early commercial returns- lots of Bud Light, lots of movie trailers. Very stoked for Springsteen’s halftime show.

6:54 Tackling seems to be a problem for the Arizona defense. This could be a problem down the line for them.

6:59 it’s a shame that Heath Miller plays for Pittsburgh, because I’m forced to hate him when I’d otherwise be one of his biggest fans.

7:00 How would Mike Tomlin know that Roethlisberger isn’t the same guy he was three years ago? Mike Tomlin wasn’t in Pittsburgh three years ago.

Second Quarter

7:04 Relatively quick first quarter. Only two penalties, one score, and one challenge.

7:08 Bill Simmons’s head just exploded; Gary Russell just scored a touchdown.

7:11 Hard hitting analysis- Arizona’s going to need to possess the ball some if they want to be in this game.

7:12 How long do you think Budweiser will keep milking the Clydesdale thing? Apparently forever.

7:13 HOLY MOTHER FUCKING SHIT, STAR TREK!!!!!!!!

7:18 Hmm, I’m guessing Fitzgerald and Boldin each have 3 guys covering them. James, Hightower, Arrington, Pope, and Breaston all better be ready to set up. Boldin and Fitzgerald probably won’t get a lot of chances, so they’ll need to make them count when they do.

7:20 Kinda like that.

7:21 So, did anyone have Gary Russell and Ben Patrick scoring the first two touchdowns of the game, because you just made a lot of money.

7:25 Great, a montage of Kurt Warner falling down. I'm sure he loves that.

7:27 Rodgers-Cromartie will get an interception by the end of the game. Put it on the board.

7:31 Nice return. And great job on the cutback by 52 NOT blocking in the back.

7:35 More talking babies? Seriously? Boo for recycled ad campaigns.

7:36 Fuck Dick LeBeau. He was 12-33 as the head coach of the Bengals, which translate to “epic fail.”

7:41 HELL YEAH!!!! Prop bet alert: first turnover, Roethlisberger interception.

7:42 Teleflora.com…. um…. yeah.

7:46 Great play by Hightower. Richmond represent!

7:48 Welcome to the game, Larry Fitzgerald!

7:50 First and goal at the 2, 0:18 left in the half; that should be 3 shots at the end zone, 2 if you want to leave time for a field goal try. I’d look at the jump ball to one of the big two receivers.

7:51 No. Fucking. Way.

7:52 Please God, he was down. Please God, he was down. Please God, his elbow was down.

7:55 FUCK.

Halftime

7:56 My final call for Bruce’s set list is The Rising, Badlands, My Lucky Day, Born To Run.

8:00 Thoughts on 3D- I’ve always found 3D a bit hokey, but I might be okay with this new INTRU3D because its not just about things flying out of the screen toward you, like it used to be. The focus now seems to be more on creating a sense of depth INTO the screen, which is a little less silly than people reaching out and touching you. We’ll see how I feel about it on Monday after watching an entire episode of Chuck in 3D.

8:06 So John Elway can fly. Explains the “Helicopter Play.”

8:07 The Boss! Yeah, it should’ve been obvious that Tenth Avenue Freeze Out was going to be on the set list when it reported that Bruce stole Conan’s horn section from Late Night.

8:10 Puts Born To Run in the two hole. I really thought he’d close with this one. In fact, more people trying to guess the setlist also thought this one would come at the end. Shows you what we know. One for two on songs, missed the order here.

8:14 Damn. I thought Working On A Dream would be too mellow of a song for the halftime show. It is the title track of the new album and all, but I still thought he’d go with something more upbeat, like My Lucky Day. I didn’t count on him trotting out the gospel choir. That was the trump card.

8:16 Glory Days, with revised football-centric lyrics. I had Glory Days on the list earlier in the week, but I dropped it in favor of Badlands. Oh well.

8:20 Bruce haters be damned, I glad Springsteen played the Super Bowl. Could have done without the ref gag, though, but the back and forth with Van Zant (“Hey Stevie, what time is it?) is a typical concert thing, so they just worked it into their normal routine.

Third Quarter

8:28 Arizona has to score on this opening drive, otherwise I think they’re done.

8:34 Why haven't the Cards challenged down the field. The underneath stuff is fine, but you’ve got to try downfield.

8:36 Fuck. Let that not be a fumble.

8:39 Thank God. However, having to punt is still bad news for the Cardinals.

8:42 I was just thinking, “Man, the Cardinals could sure use Rod Tidwell.”

8:47 Wow, don’t know about that roughing the passer call. It wasn’t excessively late, he didn’t lead with the helmet; I don’t like it.

8:53 Are fucking kidding me? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?!?! Running into the holder? Are you a fucking idiot? Touchdown here and the game is over.

8:56 Hmm…. hold them to another field goal try. Still bad, but not completely atastrophic.

8:57 HOLY MOTHERFUCKING SHIT, TRANSFORMERS!!!!!!

8:58 I wanna punch a koala. Where do I apply for that job?

9:02 Prop bet alert: Shots of Brenda Warner- 2. Has Madden made any references to food items yet? I haven’t really been paying attention.

9:04 Al Michaels just mentioned what I wrote 30 minutes ago. You have to at least try to go downfield and give you’re best players a chance to make a play.

Fourth Quarter

9:07 YES! The 1-second High Light commercial! Love it!

9:08 The penalties are killing the Cardinals. So is their unwillingness to try the deep ball. It’s the last game of the year; you can’t hold anything back now.

9:15 Man, is that the first sack of Roethlisberger of the game? About time, but its probably too little too late.

9:17 Seriously, Tory Polumalu as Mean Joe Green? That's sacrilege. He talks like Mike Tyson.

9:18 Okay, Ed McMahon + MC Hammer + Tax Problems = Awesome.

9:22 Well, well, well… quick score here, and maybe the game’s not over. Yet.

9:25 Would you look at that? Jump ball to Fitzgerald, touchdown. Man, that would’ve been a great play call at the end of the first half. Instead, it was a 100-yard TAINT for the Steelers. Prop bet alert: Shots of Brenda Warner- 3

9:29 Stay away from the silly penalties, get a stop, and maybe the bus isn’t heading back to Arizona just yet.

9:31 Sacks are good. To quote the Columbia Band: Scrotum! Scrotum! Quarterback sack!

9:32 Great 3 and out for Arizona. NOW, we have a game. C’mon Warner, you can punch your ticket to Canton right here, right now.

9:33 MacGrubber? Not funny. MacGrubber featuring Richard Dean Anderson? A little funny (funnier, at least). Not as good as his Mastercard commercial a few years back.

9:36 Still trying the running game. Interesting. I guess you want to keep the defense honest. I don't like it, though. Throw the damn ball.

9:38 Prop bet alert: Shots of Brenda Warner- 4

9:40 Excellent coverage-if you can, always try and catch the ball BEFORE it hits the ground; if it hits the ground, you have no idea where it will bounce. And James Harrison is a punk bitch. Fuck James Harrison.

9:43 DAMN, that was close. Might have been a safety.

9:44 NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

9:45 YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyone bet on a safety in the game? Because you just got paid.

9:46 Okay Warner, you’ve got ANOTHER chance to punch your ticket to Canton. Make it happen.

9:48 Larry Fitzgerald is a man. If the game ends like this, Fitzgerald is your MVP. Sorry, Kurt.

9:50 Now, Cardinals defense, what are you made of? Time to man up.

9:53 Ooh, almost made a mistake there with rushing a play before the 2 minute warning. A pick there would’ve been nice.

9:59 That was a touchdown right there, and Holmes would have been your MVP.

10:00 Shit. NOW, Holmes is your MVP. Fuck.

10:05 For a THIRD time tonight, Warner, you have a chance to get into Canton. Time to channel your inner Doug Flutie.

10:09 Fuck. I hate the Steelers. Santonio Holmes if your MVP and I don’t think its close. Fucking Buckeyes. Oh well, that was a damn good game. Better than last year’s Super Bowl? I don’t know. But it was damn good game.

10:10 Final prop bet alert: Color of Gatorade dumped on winning coach- lemon-lime/yellow. Well, okay, no, I guess there’s still the bet on who the game MVP thanks first. But I’m turning it off now.

Final thoughts on Super Bowl XLIII: fuck the Steelers. There, that’s it. Okay, not really. I really thought going down 20-7 was the end for the Cardinals. But they battled back and put themselves in a position to win the game, and they deserve a hell of a lot of credit for that. If anyone still questions whether Larry Fitzgerald is the best receiver in the game, they’re a moron. There, now that's it.

And fuck the Steelers.