Citius. Altius. Fortius.

We're just a few days away from the start of the Olympics (yeah, yeah, technically they've already started with a few soccer matches already in the books), and I couldn't be more stoked. Yeah, I know I just went on and on about how I'm stoked for the start of college football season. Truth is, its still a ways off, and without the Olympics to help fill the time, I'd be left with having to watch the Reds try and put together the all-elusive one-game winning streak. Forget it. Its all about the Olympics for the next two weeks (note: check out Jim Caple's piece on this year's games at ESPN.com; I think he gives some great perspective).

I've already talked about Olympics and why I love watching them. I've got some predictions for the upcoming games, but I'll save those from later in the post. In that earlier post about the Olympics, I eluded to the idea that some of the Olympic "sports," by my definition, aren't sports at all. It never fails; every two years, I have the same argument (usually with a member of the opposite sex)- I say, "Gymnastics (or figure skating, diving, trampoline, etc.) isn't a real sport" and they take offense.

Now, when I say something "isn't a sport," I'm not trying to be demeaning; some people are when they say that, I'm not one of them. I simply believe that things should be organized and classified correctly, and that there should be a stated difference between "sport" and " athletic competition" (for lack of a better term).

First, I loosely define sport as a competitive activity requiring both a physical and mental ability. Games, such as chess or cards, are not sports because there is no physicality involved (well, at least there isn't any physicality required to participate). From there, I define what's not a sport, and whatever is left, is.

So what's makes something not a sport? Simple- judges. If judges are used to decide the winner, its not a sport. If any third-party is required and is essential to the outcome, not a sport. There needs to be a quantitative end for it to be a sport, not a qualitative one. This doesn't include boxing judges (or really any judge in a contact sport) because those judges aren't essential to the outcome of the sport; they're simply used to protect the athletes and regulate the sport. A quick back-of-the-envelope test is asking if it can it be turned in to a pickup game? Baseball? Yes. Football? Yes. Curling? Yes. Gymnastics? No. Figure Skating? No. You can't have a pickup game of gymnastics. It just doesn't work.

[Note: So far, I've only come up with one event that seems to buck my definition of sport- ski jumping. Final scores are a combination of distance jumped (quantitative) and the technique executed in the jump (qualitative). However, I still classify is as a sport by using the justification that you could determine the winner by distance alone, and execution would simply be a tie breaker if needed.]

One more point that I need to mention- non-sport status does not imply that its participants aren't athletes. Sport doesn't imply athlete, athlete doesn't imply sport. Baseball players are athletes, and baseball is a sport. Gymnasts are athletes, but gymnastics is not a sport. Golfers aren't necessarily athletes (some are like Tiger Woods, some are like John Daly), but golf is a sport.

Again, I'm not trying to demean or belittle gymnast, figure skaters, or even trampoliner-ists (whatever the hell they're called) when I say what they do isn't a sport. I'm simply saying that its not a sport. When I say an event is silly, inane, and worthless (like trampoline or rhythmic gymnastics), then I'm being demeaning.

Onto the bold predictions for the Olympics. I know I'm tempting the wrath of the whatever from high atop the thing by making predictions (given my track record on this blog), but I can't be scared of curses. So here they are, stone-cold lock predictions*:

-Michael Phelps does not win 8 gold medals. I want him to, I really do, but I don't think its going to happen. Either one of the relays lets him down or Ryan Lochte finally snaps after another second place finish and gnaws off Phelps's left arm (to which Phelps goes on to win a few silvers, swimming with one arm).

-Dara Torres wins gold. At this point, how can she not?

-Lui Xiang crumbles under the weight of a billion Chinese and does not repeat as gold medalist in the 110 hurdles (which is too bad for him because he'll probably have to go into exile after the games).

-After the 4th day of coverage, the media will be so focused on the games that they will forget to talk about the pollution in Beijing or China's track record on human rights. Except for Bob Costas. He'll find a way ever so often to slip in some backhanded compliment to China, and he'll get away with it because he's Bob Costas. Odds that at some point Costas shouts, "You're excited? Feel these nipples!"- 1084 to 1.

-Tyson Gay breaks the 100 meter world record. I mean, I already jinxed him once; it can't happen again, can it?

-At least one other US athlete will be tossed out for doping ('cause we're nothing but a bunch of dirty cheaters now).

-Despite Jui Xiang's imminent failure, China uses the home field advantage to win the most gold medals for the games, but the US will still dominate the overall medal count.

Okay, I think that's enough jinxing for one day. One last thing, I've read that Lopez Lomong, a 1,500 meter runner and former "Lost Boy" of Sudan, has been chosen to carry the flag for the United States in the Opening Ceremonies. Great choice; he's got a remarkable story. I saw a piece about him on HBO's Real Sports a few days ago and ESPN's got a great article about him as well (it was written before the Olympic trials). Read it, and catch Olympic fever.





[*Meaning they have about a 37% chance of being close to maybe being almost accurate.]